10 Fun Ideas for Couples

by Shelli Proffitt Howells

Marriage is supposed to be fun! If you've fallen into a rut and forgotten that, it is time to find fun activities you and your spouse can enjoy together.

Happiness is being married to your best friend. But maybe these days, your husband is sitting at the computer playing video games while you sit on the couch knitting, and you feel more like comfortable strangers or accidental roommates than best friends.

It doesn't have to be that way. You can easily recapture the fun of your dating days by finding activities that you and your spouse can enjoy together.

Take an interest in your spouse's activities

Ladies, you don't have to be a football widow every fall. Learn the rules of the game and get to know some of the players. You might enjoy rooting for the underdog.

Men, you like to eat, don't you? Offer to plan a gourmet dinner you could cook together. You can choose a meal full of your favorites, or maybe you'll want to try something unusual and different.

My husband enjoys watching MMA, otherwise known as Ultimate Fighting. I started watching with him. I learned some of the athletes' histories, which made them more interesting to me. I discovered that it isn't as brutal a sport as it first appears, and there is a lot of strategy involved. I really enjoy going out to dinner at a sports bar and watching the fights. It has become a fun way to spend time together.

Invite your spouse to try something you enjoy

Ladies, your husband might not be content to sit quietly by your side and knit, but I'm sure there are a lot of other things that you do that will entertain him. Share your interests in literature, music and movies.

I'm an avid book lover. My husband will read many of the books I've recommended. We discuss it after he has finished, so it is kind of like our own personal book club.

He, on the other hand, loves discovering the latest, coolest bands. He shares with me the newest CDs that have come out, and we watch music videos together. We also enjoy going out to concerts.

Men, do you like playing video games? Invite your wife to join you. Many video games are multi-player and easy to pick up. Some games are more wife-friendly than others. Choose one that has role playing, encourage her to create a sexy character and flirt while you quest together.

Learn something new together

It's time to get out of that rut and try something new. Lifestyle Updated points out that learning something new can boost your self-esteem and give you a sense of accomplishment and pride. More importantly, perhaps, US News reports that trying new and challenging activities with your spouse can boost the brain chemical dopamine, which helps fuel sex drive.

Here are some ideas for hobbies you can do as a couple.

• Arts and crafts. Take an art class together. Learn ceramics, photography or woodworking.
• Outdoors. Go camping or hiking. Try spelunking, which is exploring caves. Learn how to canoe. If you live near the beach, try surfing, snorkeling or scuba diving.
• Sports. Join a bowling league. Ride bicycles together. Take a dance class together or go line dancing. Learn to ride horses. Try racquet sports like tennis or racquetball. Learn an unusual sport like archery or sailing.
• Culture. Visit art galleries or museums. Go to a comedy club. Watch a play or ballet. Go to a concert together.
• Collecting. Visit auctions and collect antiques. Go to car shows. Collect coins, comic books or sports memorabilia. Visit a flea market for unusual finds. See if you can repurpose and flip your items to make a profit.
• Go extreme. If you have a real taste for adventure, try a more extreme hobby like rafting, skydiving or rock climbing. Play a game of paintball or laser tag. Buy or rent a couple of ATVs and go off-roading.

Marriage is supposed to be fun! If you've fallen into a rut and forgotten that, then it's time to try something new and rekindle your spirit of adventure.


Original Article: familyshare.com

Why FIRST LOVE Never Dies

by Vladlena Lee

7 Reasons Why First Love is So Powerful...

There is no specific reason why first love is so powerful, because it’s an accumulation of small details that make it momentous. It’s filled with intense and passionate emotions that you think will last forever, which may be the reason why everyone says first love is hard to forget. However, it makes perfect sense because it’s the first time you truly love and feel loved by a person outside your family. Even when that #relationship is over, it remains as a big part of who you are. So in case you were wondering, here are a number of reasons why first love is so powerful.

1. EXPERIENCE FEELINGS FOR THE FIRST TIME

The second you fall in love for the first time, you suddenly realize the difference between loving someone and liking someone. You notice that having a #crush on someone is nothing compared to loving a person unconditionally. Getting a sudden surge of emotions that you may have never felt before and being introduced to those feelings for the first #time is why first love is so powerful.

2. MEMORIES WILL LAST FOREVER

It’s interesting how even years after falling in love and moving on to other #people, you never truly forget the first person you fell in love with and the memories you've shared. You might not think about them on a daily basis, but they pop into your head every once in a while. Nobody can blame you for that because at some point in your life, those memories made you extremely happy.

3. THERE IS NOTHING LIKE FIRST LOVE

Although the love of your life can’t really compare to your first love, first love always has a special place in your heart. There is something about that bond that you make with the first person you love that can’t be compared to anything else. Not only that, but first love is filled with firsts: first ‘I love you,’ first heartbreak, etc.

4. IT SETS THE CRITERION

Some often use their first love as a standard for their future relationships because that was all they knew back then. For example, if their first love was exciting and passionate, other relationships might seem dull in comparison. And when other relationships don’t meet their standards, first love becomes ever more valuable and memorable.

5. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE INTERESTED ABOUT HIM

Once your first love pops back into your mind, you always wonder how he is doing now and where life has taken him. You become so curious that you might check up on him using social media or casually ask an old friend who is still in touch with him. It’s completely normal to still be interested in him years later, as long as you are not overly curious.

6. FIRST BREAK UP

With first love, there is always first heartbreak because for most of us, first loves don't last. You might not be the same #people you used to be when you got together and go separate ways, but that first heartbreak will take a toll on you. Just like all the happy memories you've shared together, your first heartbreak registers in your brain and adds on to the importance of that #relationship.

7. FIRST LOVE NEVER DIES

No matter how much time passes, you will always care about the person you first fell in love with to some degree. You might not feel those same butterflies in your #stomach, but there will be something deep down in your heart for that person. You can’t really describe it, because it’s not love anymore but it’s not indifference either!

Memories of our first love are just reminders of young love that we have once experienced. So let’s take a trip down memory lane and remember the first #time we fell in love! How would you describe your first love? Share in the comments!

Originally this article appeared in love.allwomenstalk.com

How to Ask for Forgiveness After Cheating

You have to understand that asking for forgiveness is not a “sybaritic” approach, which means it is not an easy process… It is hard and I can surely attest to that. If you want to find the best way to ask for forgiveness after cheating, what is important is to remember is that you have to find out some good ways to regain the trust of your spouse and do it slowly: not in a rush. The first step is to come to terms with yourself as to why this trust was lost and hold yourself accountable for what you have done. Never lose focus of the fact that you are accepting the wrong you have committed and you are willing to do whatever it takes to . Infidelity in marriage is not an easy thing to deal with but as I showed you on behalf of Dr. Huizenga most couples do not end their relationship after incident of an affair and with the right professional guidance are able to forgive one another.

How to Ask for Forgiveness After Cheating

How to Ask for Forgiveness After Cheating

Of course, you have to prove yourself once gain that your apologies are for real, give him or her some time to assess you and your honesty. But keep in mind getting forgiveness for infidelity is not overnight thing… a relationship may not be restored swiftly. Here are a few pointers to start you on the road of gaining forgiveness:

1. The Value of Apologies

A heartfelt and sincere apology is usually critical. Family experts who give relationship advice often suggest that when cheating occurs in a relationship, the person who has committed it should take the responsibility of being a cheater that has put their relationship at risk. Try to avoid using lame lines such as “it just happened” or “that was not my fault”. Instead accept your fault! You can write apologies or speak to your partner over the phone. Face to face conversation is also good, if can bring yourself do it properly. If you usually let too much emotions come out of you as opposed to reason then it maybe best to write an email or a note to your spouse.  You have offended him or her so choose the meeting venue accordingly. Try different methods to apologize, but keep in mind that if your partner is not ready to receive your apology, then you should pace for a while. Do not sound desperate or risk the situation. Not everyone can accept an apology so quickly; your words will vibrate in her or his mind. So allow the seed to grow.

2. Understand How they Feel

Ok so you have cheated on our spouse an know you really feel bad about it but want to get back together and make up. You have promised yourself and her that it was nothing serious and you will not do it ever again. If you seriously want to find out how to ask for forgiveness after cheating try to understand how they feel as well. Usually when we become desperate we ignore the other person’s  feelings, so again depending on your situation try to really understand how a man feels after being cheated on or how a woman feels after being cheated on.

3. Give it Time and Don’t Rush

Asking for forgiveness in a marriage is not always an easy task especially if it’s in regards to infidelity and cheating on their person as it depends on several factors. The more your partner loves you, the more she or he gets hurt due to the infidelity. So, if you are thinking about finding answer to how to make up after infidelity, think about the positive aspects of your relationship, and give it time. This is what we routinely see Hollywood movies where men who cheat are prone to cheat. However, in real life is completely different; men or women who cheat and come forward to ask for forgiveness are less likely to cheat again.  If this is you then have to promise your partner that you will change yourself, and you will make sure that you will never do this again. You are willing to do whatever it takes to prove this to him or her.

Bottom Line

Forgiveness can’t be forced or rushed, so have patience and make sure you do not make mistakes in offering your apology that would make it worse. You must know how your partner feels at the moment, which means you have to work with their feelings to regain the trust. You are reading this because you really love your partner and want an apology as you are searching for ways on how to ask for forgiveness after cheating so do whatever possible to get your spouse back and make your love even stronger for each other.

Original Article: howtoforgiveacheater.com

50 Ways to Make your Husband Happy

by kalyani10

When was the last time you did something special to make your husband happy? The man you exchanged vows with is so much more than just a provider and a pair of useful hands around the house. He is someone who is always there to cheer you up when you are feeling low and to celebrate with, when the good times are around. A husband is your lover, your companion and a wonderful father to your kids.

So, isn’t it time you did something fun and unexpected to gladden your husband’s heart? Whether you are a bride, eager to please her brand-new hubby, or a wife of many years wishing to sizzle up your married life, here are a 50 ways to make your husband happy and pleased that he married you. 

1. Start with a love letter. Remember how eagerly you waited in the early days of your courtship to receive a letter or just a note from each other? Do it again, but this time count all the reasons, which you think make him the best husband. Your man will not only be happy to be reminded of your love but glad to know that he makes you happy as well. 
2. Listen actively. When your husband expresses an opinion or a thought, pay attention. This shows you respect him and his views and nothing pleases a man more. 
3. Say thank you with a smile. When your husband does an odd job around the house, thank him like you really mean it. He will know that his help is not taken for granted and he will be happy to do more. 
4. Prepare his favorite meal. After he returns home from work on an ordinary day, surprise your husband with his favorite dinner. He will not only be glad to have the food he likes best, but will appreciate the time and effort you put in preparing it. 
5. Let him have the TV remote. Granted, that you wish your husband spent more time with you, than watching the sports channel, but if there is an important game that you know your husband would love to watch, hand over the TV remote graciously. 
6. Hold his gaze. When you are speaking to your husband or listening to him, make sure that you keep eye contact. This will assure him of your attention and your respect, which is empowering to any man. 
7. Plan a vacation. Make arrangements for a romantic vacation, to a destination you know your husband would love to visit. 
8. Ask his family over. Your husband’s parents mean a lot to him. So ask them over for a Sunday lunch he will be touched by your loving gesture. 
9. Gift your husband a subscription to his favorite magazine. 
10.  On the way from work, visit the bakery and pick up a dessert your husband digs. 
11. Do something he hates. Choose a chore, like buying grocery or taking out the laundry, your husband really dislikes doing and then go on to do it cheerfully. 
12. Have his pals over. If a Super Bowl game or something equally popular is coming up, let your husband know he can watch it at home with his mates. Admittedly there will be beer cans and hot dog wrappers to clean up the next day, but your hubby will love your generosity. 
13. Appreciate his interests. If your husband is into carpentry, praise the bookstand he has made, even if it wobbles just a wee bit. Or if he loves collecting coins, buy him a book on numismatics. Your interest in his hobbies will give your husband a feeling of pride and make him happy. 
14. Book your husband on a golf vacation and do it happily. 
15. Give your husband a nice massage, after a particularly exhausting day at work. 
16. Make your husband a bowl, of popcorn, as he settles down to watch his favorite DVD. 
17. Get him tickets to his favorite ballgame and then surprise him by lustily cheering for his favorite team. 
18. Buy a really expensive gift for your husband, like a watch from Cartier or a Bvlgari perfume. 
19. Don’t nag, if he gets lost while taking out the family on a road trip. 
20. Send the kids to their grandparents’ or to a family member’s for a sleepover. Then snuggle up to your husband and ask what he would like to do, for the rest of the evening. 
21. Find out your husband’s favorite after-shave and buy it for him. 
22. Recreate your first date and your husband is sure to be happy falling in love with you all over again. 
23. Tell your husband to take a night out with his pals. Not only will he have a good time, but he will also be grateful for your thoughtfulness. 
24. Put on your sexiest lingerie and get ready for an intimate evening with your husband. He will be happy to know you still desire him as a lover. 
25. Book yourselves on a luxury cruise. Your husband will not only enjoy the sun and the sights, but will be happiest doing nothing the whole day. 
26. Gift him a customized CD by compiling around ten of your husband’s favorite songs. 
27. Take care of your appearance. Don’t let yourself go, just because you’ve been married for quite a while. Your husband will be glad to know you still find him worth the effort and time it takes to appear well-groomed. 
28. Greet your husband at the door dressed in your best gown and with two glasses of champagne. After he recovers from the initial shock, he will be glad that you came up with such a great idea to welcome him. 
29. Tell your husband he smells nice. 
30. Flirt with your husband in front of his friends. Hold his gaze, touch his legs under the table and steal quick kisses. Your hubby will love to relive the days of romance. 
31. When you are sitting together, quietly slip your hand into his. Your husband will love the easy expression of intimacy between you two. 
32. Buy him a set of golf clubs or whatever sport equipment he is interested in. 
33. Stop trying to change your husband into someone else, after all you married him for who he is. 
34. Meet him for lunch at his office and suggest a quick bite. He will love your spontaneity and the fact that you took out time from your own schedule. 
35. The next time you decide to eat out, let your husband choose the restaurant and the menu. 
36. Ask him to share his fantasy with you and see if you can try it out – or at least a part of it. Even if you both end up laughing, your husband will be pleased to know you care about what he wants. 
37. Do something fun together like a trip to an amusement park or going for a circus show. 
38. Pick up the kids from their soccer or music practice, when it is actually your husband’s turn to do so. 
39. Go out after dinner. Put the kids in bed and steal away with your husband for an ice-cream for a stroll in the park. Your husband will be pleased at spending some quiet time with you. 
40. Find one thing to compliment about your husband and do it sincerely. 
41. Let your husband be at home the next time you want to go Christmas shopping. He will be glad to have escaped the chore and you might have more fun doing it with someone, who enjoys shopping, like your mom or a friend. 
42. Remind your husband that he is the sexiest man you ever set eyes on. 
43. Leave a love note in your husband’s briefcase or in the car. Just a sentence telling him that he means so much to you. 
44. Pursue an interest together – like a dance class or a photography club. He will be happy to feel connected to you. 
45. Go for a hike in the mountains. You both will love the fresh air and the casual intimacy. 
46. Be the perfect hostess, if your husband invites his boss over for dinner. 
47. Learn a skill or a new language. Your husband will be happy and proud of your achievements. 
48. Get your husband something he always wanted, but never got around buying it. 
49. Go over his high school photos together and remark how handsome he was even all those years back. 
50. Find a quiet moment with your husband to whisper “ I love you” in his ears. If you have already said it, say it again. You can never say these three words too often and you can be sure, that every time it will make your husband glad, he married you. 

It doesn't take much to make your man happy. Unconditional Love and sincere appreciation are what most men expect in a partner. So let your imagination run riot!

Original Article: futurescopes.com

The Top 10 Secrets Of Those Highly Successful Couples We All Envy

by Victor M. Parachin

One secret to lasting love? The 60/40 rule.

Over lunch with a friend one day, Kevin was asked about the "secret of your obviously happy and healthy love relationship."

Kevin responded, "I married a wonderful woman and made the commitment to apply myself to the relationship with the same energy that I place into other important areas of my life: school, work, health, friendships. I didn't want to be casual about the relationship nor take it for granted. My partner has pretty much done the same thing. Consequently, we make a great team. I can't imagine being without her."

Highly successful couples like Kevin and his wife know that making the relationship a top priority is vital. They don't allow it to derail. They know the ingredients that are necessary to keep each other content, happy, healthy and satisfied. To put it simply, philosopher Paul Tillich observed, "Any deep relationship to another human being requires watchfulness and nourishment."

So listen up: Here are the 10 secrets of highly successful couples:

1. Successful couples enjoy each other.

It's just that simple. They like to be together, talk together, do things together. Former Beatle Ringo Starr has been married to his wife Barbara for more than three decades. He says the "secret" to the couple's longevity is this: "I'm just blessed that she puts up with me. I love the woman. She loves me. There are less down days than up, and we get on really well. We spend a lot of time together. That's the deal."

2. Successful couples fight skillfully.

"In conflict, be fair and generous," is wisdom from The Tao. When two people live together, they are bound to have differences of opinion and disagreements. Successful couples fight but do it skillfully; in a way that leaves the relationship stronger, not weaker. One technique they employ is their choice of words. For example, University of California (Berkeley) researcherslooked at "connected" couples and discovered that they tend to use plural pronouns ("we", "us" and "ours") rather than singular pronouns ("I", "me" and "mine"). As a result, they were less likely to feel stressed out after the disagreement than couples who used singular pronouns. "Using 'we language' during a fight helps couples align themselves on the same team, as opposed to being adversaries," notes lead author Benjamin Seider.

3. Successful couples seek and offer forgiveness.

They may not forgive and forget, but they do forgive and let it go. When they have done something wrong or hurtful, they offer an apology. When they are the wronged party, they accept the gift of an apology. Successful couples travel the pathway toward forgiving, which is outlined by author Clarissa Pinkola Estes, who cites these four stages for arrival at complete forgiveness:

-- Forgo: Take a break from thinking about the person or event for a while.

-- Forebear: Abstain from punishing, neither thinking about it nor acting on (the offense) in small or large ways. Give a bit of grace to the situation.

-- Forget: Refuse to dwell; let go and loosen one's hold, particularly on memory. To forget is an active — not passive — endeavor.

-- Forgive: Make a conscious decision to cease to harbor resentment, which includes forgiving a debt and giving up one's resolve to retaliate.

4. Successful couples are in for the long haul.

"There are only two options regarding commitment. You're either in or you're out. There's no such thing as life in between," says professional basketball coach Pat Riley. Successful couples don't just make promises to each other; they commit. After a marriage that spans 30 years, a couple named Doris and Jim say, "We are happy together because we have lived out our vows — for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sickness and in health." When Doris was in a serious auto accident a few years ago she remembers that "Jim was there all the way. He's an incredible husband, the most selfless person. He's the only person in the world I know I can count on."

5. Successful couples are positive about each other.

Marriage researcher John Gottman, Ph.D, says happy couples have relationships "characterized by respect, affection and empathy, and they pay close attention to what's happening in each other's lives." Furthermore, his research reveals that happy and stable couples "made five positive remarks for every one negative remark when they were discussing conflict. In contrast, couples headed for divorce offered less than one positive remark for every single negative remark."

6. Successful couples learn and grow together.

One couple, after being married for 30 years, decided they would both return to university for master's degrees in liberal arts. "It took us nearly five years. We had a great time being in class together, studying together, reading together. The program allowed us to expand our horizons as we took courses in religion, politics, literature, history, foreign policy. We even persuaded one professor to let us write a paper together: joint authors!" Partners in successful couples play to each other's strengths and interests. If one partner becomes more health conscious, the other joins. If one partner takes up a new activity, the other partner becomes supportive and involved. The end result is a stronger emotional bond and a deeper love.

7. Successful couples never stop dating.

That was one of the "secrets" of a happy relationship uncovered by Matthew Boggs and Jason Miller. The duo traveled over 12,000 miles searching and interviewing people they called "marriage masters" — those married 40 years or more. One common element to many marriage masters was their ability to keep the romance going. Some set aside one evening a week for a date, others planned romantic getaways periodically, while others still met most afternoons for conversation at a coffee or tea shop.

8. Successful couples bring each other joy.

In his book, The Real Rules of Life: Balancing Life's Terms with Your Own, Ken Druck, Ph.D, tells about a workshop he gave to his wife as a birthday gift. "She had a beautiful voice that she rarely used. What better gift than to unleash the joy she already possessed." In the workshop, participants of every age and background were encouraged to "vanquish the wagging finger of self-condemnation and sing their hearts out." The workshop high point was a live concert for family and friends. "With the exception of our children's births, I can never recall my wife as having been so joyful and happy."

9. Successful couples adhere to the 60/40 rule.

Boggs and Miller also discovered that "marriage masters" have a high level of selflessness. "Walter" whom they interviewed, told them, "I'll never forget what my mentor told my wife and me before we got married 42 years ago. He looked at us and said, 'Most people think marriage is 50/50. It's not. It's 60/40. You give 60. You take 40. And that goes for both of you." It was a principle Walter and his wife adhered to faithfully.

10. Successful couples have shared values. 

When asked about her successful relationship of 58 years, "Emma" age 87, smiled and proudly said, "It is quite an achievement. It's important to have the same basic values. In other words, if you're a free spender, marry someone who understands that. If you're frugal, you need to marry someone who understands that because money is one of the stumbling blocks in marriage. Fortunately, we had the same values on most things. We usually had the same goals — we believed in education; we wanted to be moral; we wanted to raise children to be good citizens and to be responsible in terms of finances."

Poet Robert Browning put the secret to successful couples in a nutshell when he wrote, "Success in marriage is more than finding the right person: It is being the right person."

Original Article: yourtango.com