Wednesday, May 20, 2015

10 Ways to Know You’re Dating a Good Woman

by James Michael Sama 


If reading this is your first introduction to my writing, I feel the need to give a disclaimer. I am writing this article because I published a male version a few months ago and fair is fair, ladies…I also typically write on equality, love, and respect.
That being said – while women are more likely to speak up about their dating dissatisfaction than men are, I think it’s equally as important to discuss both sides of the coin.

So, how does a good woman with class act when in a relationship?

A good woman moves past petty jealousies. 

While some jealousy [protectiveness] is natural in a relationship, it’s important that both partners are secure enough in themselves and each other to know where to focus their energy.
A mature woman will allow the man in her life to have his freedom, providing he doesn’t betray her trust.

A good woman is intellectually challenging.

There is no denying that someone’s looks are what initially draws us to them. It’s difficult to spot a great personality from across the room. Many a fling was built on physical attraction alone, but how long can it last?
When conversations lack depth or intrigue, we often fill our time with physical activity together, but it is impossible to build a real connection or lasting relationship with someone on that alone. Being intellectually challenging and having the ability to hold real discussions about meaningful topics, will always trump shallow beauty in the long run.

A good woman is honest and genuine.

How long will you stay in a committed relationship with a beautiful or handsome liar? If you cannot trust your partner or believe what they say, how can you construct a solid, lasting foundation with them? You can’t.

A good woman is empathetic. 

Being compassionate, supportive, and encouraging towards your partner is a huge part of building a successful relationship. Nobody wants a person who is a “Debbie Downer” all the time and will not support them in their endeavors or their times of need.

A good woman is ambitious.

In addition to supporting and encouraging you pursuing your own goals and dreams, she will have her own as well. A mature woman has a vision for her future and chases after it with voracity.
A mature woman will be someone you can take on the world with. A partner in crime, a teammate in your relationship, and in life.

A good woman is consistent.

Being consistent is a valuable virtue because it lets your partner know that you really are who you are. You haven’t sent your “representative” to get to know them during the first couple of months of dating, but then suddenly transform once they’ve committed themselves to you.
To clarify the point, think of consistency as the opposite of volatility. If someone is unpredictable and volatile, it’s difficult to know how they will be acting towards you on a certain day, and that gets old no matter how aesthetically pleasing she is.

A good woman puts in effort for you.

I am all about giving in relationships. I believe seeing your significant other happy should also make you happy – but it is important to understand that it goes both ways.
Her putting in effort doesn’t have to be much. It can be something as simple as slipping the waiter her debit card to pay for dinner. It’s no secret that sometimes the romance wears off of longer term relationships, but you shouldn’t let it – and neither should she.
If a woman continues to do what she knows attracted you in the first place, even after she got you a long time ago, it shows she cares about keeping you around.

A good woman carries herself with class.

I’ve said it before, and I will say it again. Class has nothing to do with the price tag on your outfit. Class is about the dignity you carry yourself with and the level of respect you show to those around you.
It doesn’t matter what kind of car someone is driving, what part of town they live in, or what brand of clothing they’re wearing – if they have an ugly attitude and embarrass others in public, none of it matters.

A good woman works to improve herself.

Whether it be committing to reading a new book or watching a documentary on a topic she wants to learn more about, a mature woman is always looking to improve in order to live a happier life.
In a generation of photoshop and ultra-thin fashion models, there is so much emphasis on improving the body that we cannot forget to also improve the mind.

A good woman will make you want to be the best version of yourself, without changing who you really are.

This is an identical point to the last one in the male version of this article, because it is equally true for both genders. A woman will empower those around her. She will strive for greatness and therefore inspire others to strive for it as well. This not only includes friends and co-workers, but also significant others.
As Mark Twain said – Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
Original Article: jamesmsama.com


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