by Samantha Rodman PhD
Do you only have five minutes to make your wife happy per day? No, you probably have more, but it's a good thought experiment to show that even tiny increments of time can make a huge difference in your marriage. This is a relationship-focused extension of this piece about how to make your life better in 60 seconds a day. Let's discuss how five minutes can make your wife happy, as long as you are really trying proactively.
Do you only have five minutes to make your wife happy per day? No, you probably have more, but it's a good thought experiment to show that even tiny increments of time can make a huge difference in your marriage. This is a relationship-focused extension of this piece about how to make your life better in 60 seconds a day. Let's discuss how five minutes can make your wife happy, as long as you are really trying proactively.
1. When you get home, ask, "What can I do to help?" Then for at least five minutes, actually do what she says. A lot of people ask this question and then do half of the job. So, the job is set the table, and they take out some plates. Or the job is diaper the baby, and they leave the wipes and the cream open and an empty bag of diapers laying around. Only five minutes is necessary for many household related tasks, or five minutes could make a good dent. At the very least, for five minutes your wife will see you fully engaged in a task, and not sitting doing nothing (which women hate), and that will magically make her happy and less stressed out.
2. Tell your wife what she does that you appreciate. For five whole minutes, tell her what she does that makes you happy and feel appreciative and grateful. Five minutes is a long time to talk, and you'll see that this can make a real positive impact on your wife's feelings. She may look at you with a smile like she did when you were dating. Or a more tired version of it at least.
3. Send your wife an email about how much you love her. No logistics, no plans, just a love letter. Women love this stuff. Most of them. If you try it and it doesn't have any happiness impact, then next time try the next one...
4. Go on Amazon or Etsy and take five minutes to buy your wife a little surprise present like this (just kidding, unless you just got a huge bonus). This doesn't take very long. If you need inspiration, read this. Or buy yourself this.
5. When you want to have sex, look into your wife's eyes and tell her how much you want her and how sexy she is. Use SPECIFICS. Do this for five minutes. This is longer than most men take, by a power of 1 million. Because, let's face it, the usual is, "You're so hot," or no words at all, and then onto the kissing, if not the main event. Five minutes of saying how much you desire your wife and WHY is five minutes more than she may have heard in a while.
Now, share this article if you think it would make you happier, whether you're a woman or a man. And tell me which ones worked for you! Till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says Any Goal Can Be Broken Down Into Manageable Increments.
This article was originally published on Dr. Psych Mom. Follow Dr. Rodman on Dr. Psych Mom, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. Pre-order her book, How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family.
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