Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Hail to the New Chief and the First Lady in Love!

I, like so many Americans and world citizens, am very impressed by our new president and first lady for many reasons and am very excited for this new era in American leadership. However, as you know, I am not a political commentator but a relationship one, and so to mark the beginning of this wonderful new couple in the White House I thought I would comment on my perception of what they are currently modeling as a couple for all of us to witness.

I think that President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama model a relationship we haven't seen in the American White House for, well, maybe ever in any of our lifetimes.

The Empowered Healthy Man and The Empowered Healthy Woman standing side-by-side, united in love, in partnership, in family, and in service to something much greater than themselves-- the community, the country, and the world.

Yes, we have witnessed one or several of these elements in past presidential couple's relationship dynamics to greater or lesser degrees. Certain unifying elements that stand out in recent presidential couples are, for instance, Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter's partnership and service commitment, Ronald and Nancy Reagan's love and partnership, Bill and Hillary Clinton's united commitment to service, and our most recent Bush couple seemed united in their love and family.

And while each of these former presidential couples had their uniting stand out qualities, none seem to come close to what Barack and Michelle exhibit together both in love and at work. So let's break down just exactly what qualities are being exhibited by them that creates such a refreshing and inspiring relationship.

President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama Model:

* Individual Strength and Integrity
* Development of Their Own Character, Passions and Abilities
* Real Partnership with Each Other
* A Shared Commitment to Service
* Consideration, Grace, Thoughtfulness, Respect to Each Other and to Others (including those who do not share their sensibilities or ideas)
* Great Chemistry
* Being In Love
* Physical, Emotional, Spiritual, and Mental Health

This Means:

* They each communicate Individual Strength and Integrity, meaning the ability to stand strong alone. They don't need each other to make themselves whole. They are whole and share a greater whole, healthy relationship because of it.
* They know who they are. They have spent years in Development of Their Own Character, Passions and Abilities. This contributes to their sense of purpose and lightness of spirit.
* They are comfortable sharing power. They naturally are comfortable in a side-by-side, shared power position. They exhibit Real Partnership with each other. They work easily as partners, listening to one another and asking for each other's opinions.
* Each one of them throughout their school and work careers have had a solid focus of a great Commitment to Service for their Communities and Country.
* They express Consideration, Grace, Thoughtfulness, and Respect to each other when they are in each other's presence and when they are not. They also express incredible consideration to others, including those who do not share their sensibilities or ideas, such as throwing John McCain a dinner in his honor before the inauguration and walking the Bushes to their plane to leave Washington-- both gestures unheard of.
* They naturally have Great Chemistry which leads me to believe they have fulfilling intimacy.
* After many years of marriage it is wonderful to see that they are In Love. This is something that cannot be faked. It either is or it isn't there-- and I am certainly happy that it is truly present for them.
* You can witness their Physical, Emotional, Spiritual, and Mental Health commitment as they each work out, are emotionally communicative and receptive, each have and demonstrate deep spiritual faith, and they love to learn and keep educating themselves mentally. This shared total health dynamic makes for a truly great relationship.

For me Maya Angelou on the "Tavis Smiley" show on January 19th summed it up perfectly when she talked about what a real man and what a real woman are. . . "You can know when a MAN is in the room-- a man may be five feet tall and white and old, he may be Asian, he may be six feet... You know that a MAN is in the room...that means you are not going to be insulted, you will not be in any way hurt; A MAN is not going to shout at you. An old male may do anything... Truth. A WOMAN too... A WOMAN is going to be kind, not indulgent, but kind, a WOMAN-- not if she is an old female she may be anything-- they can be a hag, rude, mean and cruel... A WOMAN knows enough to take responsibility for the time she takes up and the space she occupies and that is true of a MAN too."

In our new First Couple I sense the natural understanding of what a real woman and man are.

As we witness President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama now they are a role model couple for all in love. I encourage you to contemplate what this relationship dynamic looks and feels like to inspire you in your own relationship to reach an even higher standard of loving partnership.

All Hail to the Chief and the First Lady In Love!

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